The day started out innocently enough. Isabelle created this poignant depiction of our home life and gave it to me while I slurped my coffee at the computer...She is flying overhead (bouncing off the walls), Zoe is on her "keister" reading, Camille is to my right stealing chocolate out of the pantry, Jude is screaming his head off, and Simon is in the lower left hand corner putting a potato in the toilet. The picture reads, "It's like I'm in a Sea of Kayas (chaos)...thank God for the drainer." Not too far from reality, and we all enjoyed laughing at ourselves as we ate our multi-colored (food coloring) oatmeal. Within hours, however, it had all gone terribly wrong. It's a funny story, really....picture here Cheri Oteri with wild hair and smeared lipstick. I'm finally getting my shower in this morning--late--Jude is in Zoe's arms, Isabelle and Camille are doing something crafty, and Simon, well. Apparently while I was showering, Simon climbed up on the counter and decided to deficate. The little girls come running in screaming that they can't go in the kitchen now that there is poop on the counter. I'm sort of in panic mode, because the hair is full of shampoo, and you know I have a lot of it. I problem solve and ask Zoe to go in the kitchen just to make sure Simon doesn't smear the poop everywhere in an effort to "clean up." Thankfully, when I make my wet slippery way out to the kitchen he is frozen in time by his turd. I ask him, "do we go poo poo on the counter, Simon?" What a stupid question.
"Yes," he replies, very accurately.
"No, Simon, we poop in the bathroom, and it's right there," I say pointing emphatically toward the door.
"I pooped that, right there," he states, in the cutest little voice ever.
So, the moral of this story is, it's too early to go off the Lexapro.
I have to share the craziness of my life, because the laughter gleaned from it redeems it for me. I'm not saying I had five children to create blog fodder or have good stories at parties, but whatever works. Stay tuned for when I decide to home school...
Huh? Are you seriously thinking about home schooling?
ReplyDeleteLove your story... what days those were when the kids were little, I do miss them now that we are in a new phase of running around a million mile per hour and aren't home so much. This season will pass too, so I am reminding myself to enjoy it for what it is as my kids are only this age once.
What? No photos of the counter turd? You don't get your bloggity wings until you post photos of the counter turd.
ReplyDelete:-)